Things Fifteen Year Olds Shouldn't Be Able to Do

Taylor Momsen scares me.

Even in Buffy there were the “adult-teens:” high school student characters played by actors in their twenties. Charisma Carpenter was twenty-seven when she started playing the fifteen year-old snob Cordelia; Nicholas Brendon was twenty-six when he played the fifteen year-old Xander; even Sarah Michelle Gellar was a few years older than her character Buffy. At some level it makes sense: the awkward, unrefined demeanor of most teens would probably make teen dramas unable to carry a wide enough demographic for commercial viability.

Gossip Girl mostly follows the casting practices of its predecessors. Leighton Meester plays an eighteen year-old Blair at twenty-two; Blake Lively is a twenty-one year-old playing the seventeen year-old Serena; Penn Badgley is a twenty-two year-old high school senior; the list goes on.

I had always assumed that Taylor Momsen, who plays the youngest principle of the fifteen year-old Jenny Humphrey, was another adult-teen. This week I was stunned to learn that the actress that portrays by the character dealing with the most adult situations on the show is the only member of the cast that is not actually an adult: she really is fifteen!

The show has taken the standard protective father vs. edgy daughter conflict staple of teen drama to a pretty dark place: Jenny has moved out in protest of her father (Matthew Settle)’s refusal to let her gallivant all over New York for the sake of fashion. This left her prey to a head-case model, Agnes (Willa Holland—nice to see that out-of-work OC actors are getting a fresh start on the CW), who reacts quite badly to Jenny’s efforts to launch her label without her participation and torches Jenny’s designs. The major snafu to the label launch is Jenny’s age: she needs a parent’s signature on the contracts. When her to efforts to blackmail her father into signing the papers in exchange for her moving back home fail, Jenny goes to the next level, promising to seek emancipation. Keep in mind that Jenny still does not have any discernible means of supporting herself. No wonder they’re currently advertising Gossip Girl as “every parent’s worst nightmare.”

For some reason, adults playing teens caught up in the psychodrama of adult situations expressed through childish relationships isn’t all that disturbing. But how convincing Momsen is in her portrayals of Jenny’s efforts to be soulless and mercenary is downright creepy. All of which begs the question: where are her real parents?